His name is C. Dale Petersen

Dale Petersen

Compared to C. Dale Petersen, even Chuck Norris is a pussy….

Rocky Mountain Grizzly Bear Jackson Hole, Wyoming

This bear was taken by world famous hunter and hunting guide C. Dale Petersen of Jackson Hole, Wyoming. It is one of only two grizzlies known to have been killed “without” the use of modern weaponry.

Verified by game biologists, Mr. Petersen killed this bear with his hands, and oddly enough, his teeth. It is known that this bear had been aggravated by a group of backpackers, shortly thereafter, Petersen, unaware of previous happenings, came upon the bear. A fight-to-the-death ensued. Petersen, having his right hand and arm wedged in the bear’s throat, actually used his own teeth and jaws to pinch off the bear’s jugular vein. When the bear passed-out from the lack blood flow to the brain, Petersen beat the bear in the head with a stick.

Killed a grizzly bear with his BARE FUCKING HANDS. You know why? Because fuck you, that’s why.

11 Responses to His name is C. Dale Petersen

  1. writerdood says:

    There are two jugular veins. One on either side of the neck. I think this is true of bears also. How big was this guy’s mouth? Are they sure the bear didn’t suffocate from having an arm stuck down his throat? That seems more likely.

  2. The bear died from bad ass poisoning, either way.

  3. Luke says:

    See? Real americans don’t need guns. Just a stick and a good set of teeth.p

  4. Luke says:

    Having said that, is there any way of checking if guns and teeth ownership are inversely proportional?

  5. Ron Green says:

    Meh. He might make Chuck Norris look like a pussy, but he doesn’t have shit on Teddy Roosevelt…

  6. Howard says:

    And I’m sure PETA would find some excuse to vilify him. Perhaps for using the stick instead of just leaving quietly?

    Screw that, this guy gets free drinks on me any day.

  7. senpai71 says:

    Meh. He used a stick. That’s cheating.

  8. alpha4centauri says:

    Since he was alone, we have only his word on how this happened. But assuming he didn’t come across a dying bear and club it to death …

    Occluding one jugular won’t kill someone. It drains the blood from the brain, and there is another jugular on the other side and veins in the back of the neck that also drain blood. The vein blood in the brain runs in either direction, so it doesn’t have to drain through one particular vein.

    But at least in humans, there is a sensory organ in the carotid that monitors the blood pressure. By squeezing it (making it think the pressure is too high), you can cause someone’s heart rate and blood pressure to drop. Add that to the gagging effect of the hand in her throat and the bear may have just fainted like an old lady in church.

  9. G Thompson says:

    I knew it.. This is the part in the Second Amendment to the US constitution that they forgot to put in.

    ie: if you want the right to bear arms you better go out and kill one with yours first!

    yes yes I know… but its the Weekend in Australia and I have beer!!! ;)

  10. L Shulman says:

    Good thing there’s no right to arm bears.

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