Miley Cyrus

Yeah, yeah, Ken... I know.

Yeah, yeah, Ken… I know.

What do I think of Miley Cyrus’ “performance?”

Fuck you. That’s what I think of it.

Why was anyone even watching the “MTV” “music” “awards?” Who gives a sweet holy fuck about them?

A cabal of a few assholes picks their favorite corporate-approved “artists” and sells them to FUCKING SHEEP, and then the sheep are offended/aghast at what some prepackaged child did on stage?

If it bothered you, then go read a book or snort coke off an underage hooker’s ass next year instead of watching that crap. At least it will be your experience – and not some junk-mind-food garbage.

Miley isn’t the problem…. bleating herds of devolving sub-humans who buy that shit are. So if you were watching, punch yourself in the face until some clarity enters your mind.

There… doesn’t that feel better?

38 Responses to Miley Cyrus

  1. “If it bothered you, then go read a book or snort coke off an underage hooker’s ass next year instead of watching that crap.”

    I just love you for that!

  2. CPlatt says:

    Time to get rid of that TV. Think how happy you could be, with no idea who Miley Cyrus is, or what the MTV music awards are about. When I need entertainment I watch The Big Valley in YouTube. Yeah!

  3. tcarreon says:

    How blogging drives people insane. I came here for the first time today to find some stuff you wrote on the AutoAdmit case, and this is what I found in addition to what I was looking for, which was your all-too-predictable hatred for two innocent girls and one woman.

    Did you actually have to cover this story, Marc? Was that because everyone else was covering it, and you didn’t want to be left out? So even though you hated this pile of shit, you just had to step in it? Because you absolutely could not leave the group of fucking sheep to go read a book or snort cocaine off an underaged hooker’s ass, and instead had to drive traffic to the thing you hate? I think you need to cudgel your brain about where your loyalties actually lie, i.e., with the fucking sheep you supposedly despise! You are such a hypocrite.

    Why do you hate women so much? Don’t you think we’ve had enough of that shit? Do you really think your wife loves you? Well, I’m here to tell you that I know she doesn’t. And when she tells you she does, she’s lying.

    Ask her. And then use your best lawyer skills to determine whether she’s lying or not. Don’t let your ego get in the way of making a proper judgment. Pretend you don’t trust her, and that she may have committed a terrible crime, like an attempted murder or something. Then see the deception that flashes over her face like sun on water when the wind is blowing. You’re going to have to turn her into the D.A.’s office!

    Truly, it’s not her fault that she has to lie to you. If she didn’t, you might hurt her. The fact that she’s with you shows how little choice she actually had. It’s not her fault. I really wish I could help her. If she wants to get in touch with me, maybe we could work something out.

    Some women who want to get away from their abusive husbands plan FOR YEARS to do it, taking a little bit of money at a time so he won’t notice, until you have enough to buy a house and take care of your kids for a while, and then, one day when he’s at work, you’re out of there!

    • aliceccentric says:

      …the fuck?

      • Pam says:

        That is about the most bizarre comment I have ever read that also had good grammar.

        • ratt dude says:

          Ms. Carreon’s cheese has definitely slipped off the cracker! I think she likes to hear herself yap about nothing. Sharp as a bowling ball!

    • Dangerboy says:

      Just remember. Bear love good, ranty blog comments bad.

    • Mark says:

      I feel a new copypasta forming…

    • @Marc, I knew Ken pissed of Charles and Tara, but seems like he’s not the only one. I was laughing my a55 off at your post, then I see this and had a major WTF moment. I guess b/c you’re part of the ‘free speech mafia’ Tara trolls your blog looking for strange shit to write. I gotta admit though, it’s so LULZY in a WTF way it was worth reading. Tara, please write more.

  4. Gary says:

    Gee . . . guys . . . don’t you think that’s a bit harsh. Aren’t we here to all love one another? Talk like that is just gonna make you bitter.

  5. 12XU says:

    So it didn’t bother me, but there is no way in hell I’m waiting a full year to snort coke off a hooker’s ass, underage or otherwise.

  6. Frank says:

    Nicely done, bravo.

  7. Larry Sutter says:

    Well. as John Sterling might say, you’re on the mark, Randazza. If I were the Government I’d be encouraging and underwriting all this kid stuff 1000%–like the sealed packs of porn sent to the proles in *1984*–because it makes them all feel like masters of the universe while diverting their attention and energies from what’s going on in the world which might in turn lead them out to the streets to fight for social justice and institutional change—(*see,e.g.,* the Washington March–how timely– the antiwar movement, the River Rouge strike.). No more marches, thanks. That’s so fifty years ago. Just midriffs and tweets.

  8. Matthew Chiglinsky says:

    MTV has sold sex to kids for years. I have it locked out on my cable box. Why does anyone still watch MTV and expect anything but pure garbage?

  9. Huck Kennedy says:

    I found your article sophomoric. MTV sucks, gee, we didn’t know that, thanks for telling us. Gosh, we didn’t know Miley Cyrus was a totally manufactured corporate product either. Now that you’ve broken the news of that exciting development, please explain to us why we can’t still bitch about her fucked up vulgar “performance” anyway, and the issue of the over-sexification of teenage and even pre-teen girls in our popular culture in general. And don’t tell us we deserve what we get for watching MTV, because most of us complaining don’t watch MTV, DUH. That doesn’t change the fact that it still has an effect on us.

    • Whatever. The uproar isn’t because of oversexualization or anything of the sort, it’s b/c a prissy white girl got on stage acting all kinda ratchet. BTW, Marc didn’t say you couldn’t bitch, he implied you’re a douchebag if you actually care, and he’s right.

  10. “snort coke off an underage hooker’s ass next year instead of
    watching that crap.”

    I’m more of an “Amateur MILF” guy myself………..

  11. Zane Becker says:

    I hadn’t even known anything about the awards until a bunch of pictures popped up on my facebook wall.

  12. tcarreon says:

    And what is your answer to this? Oh, let me take a wild guess! “The greater good.” Fascist!

    Quote from “Unwilling Avatars,” by Mary Anne Frank


    Cyberspace idealism unsurprisingly appeals to individuals who feel their life experiences have been restricted by their physical identity: by their social status, their age, their gender, or their physical appearance. Going online allows these individuals to experience a certain kind of positive disembodiment. One’s “real” race, gender, age, and social status need never be disclosed in cyberspace, and so negative stereotypes that may *238 attach to any of those attributes can be avoided in a way not possible in real life. Particularly for historically marginalized groups, the power to re-create oneself and control the public representation of one’s identity through avatars can be liberating.

    What happens, then, when individuals are not in control of their online embodiment? What if one is embodied against one’s will, in places that one never chose to enter, in ways one never consented to be shown, in graphic and vicious detail for all the world to see and which may be impossible to erase? We would surely describe that experience as a profound loss of liberty, the very antithesis of the freeing process of avatar creation. A world populated by an increasing number of unwilling avatars, reduced to their physical characteristics, caricaturized, ventriloquized and under attack, looks much more like hell than paradise.

    • Aliceccentric says:

      tcarreon- you need to see a psychiatrist. I don’t know you, but your above communications evidence some sort of disjointed thinking. I’m not trying to offend you, really. You need help.

      • She’s butthurt b/c her husband made a complete fool of himself and became a laughingstock. They created a site to wallow in their misery and bitch (which is a perfect word) about the Free Speech Mafia (that group of effective attorneys and bloggers that work tirelessly, often pro-bono to make sure we don’t lose our 1st Amendment rights. but you’re right, she does need a psychiatrist.

    • Mark says:

      Answer to what?

    • Even _if_ that reply had anything to do with the topic at hand, (which it doesn’t), it still doesn’t carry your point of view across to us!

      It does, however, indicate that you need to read much less of whatever it is you’re reading and watch MTV more. Oh, and buy a damn dictionary.

      A “fascist” is someone who exercises strong autocratic or dictatorial control over a government.

      I fail to comprehend how a perfectly simple weblog response to some pretty tasteless (not to mention talent- and meaning-free) child soft porn on a cable TV channel can be construed as an attempt to take over the US government and exercise dictatorial control based on race or nationality. That’s not a leap of faith, it’s a plunge into an abyss!

      You keep using that word – I do not think it means what you think it means. Inconcievable!

    • Jacob H says:

      Tara Carreon,
      I think you are crazy and need help urgently. You also seem very hateful, that may or may not be related to your craziness. Does my saying that persecute you in some way?

  13. Jim says:

    Nice to know there’s still some folks with their priorities straight. Sometimes this shit just feels like a diversionary tactic for the masses.

  14. Rowan says:

    Everyone is overreacting simply because she was Hannah Montana who was supposed to be this great role model and now she is being a teenager who has a ton of freedom that she didn’t before.

  15. @Cephas. You missed the 1984 reference re: porn.
    This is a neat blog. I feel so non-ADD trying to understand it.

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  17. I just…I don’t know what to say about these comments except I wish there were more.

  18. […] Marc Randazza’s Legal Satyri­con has been rest­ing since August 2013’s Miley Cyrus: […]

  19. Mysterious One says:

    Thank goodness that I’m not the only one who refuses to follow Miley blindly, which is what my brother (who’s the same gender as me but a few years younger) does. Seriously, he drives me crazy with his fanaticism for that gal.

    By the way, I want to thank you for siding with Casey Heynes against Richard Gale, which is what I do.

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