More supplements for better living, lawyering

By J. DeVoy

I previously extolled the virtues of zinc for lawyers on this blog, and those who began using it after that post have all agreed that it was an excellent addition to their routine.  Since then, I’ve been tinkering in the lab with more life-enhancing supplements.  My regimen is not as exhaustive as this one promoted by Crime & Federalism, but it works for me and should help others as well:

Apple Cider Vinegar.  Every morning, take two tablespoons of the stuff.  Don’t buy the pasteurized Heinz vinegar – go to whole foods and get the murky unpasteurized kind.  The mother of vinegar contains most of the good stuff for you, and it burns less on the way down than something that’s been refined into a cleaning agent.

The science on Apple Cider Vinegar is mixed at best, and generally inconclusive.  Even if its used solely for a placebo effect, it’s a pretty good one.  My hair is naturally shinier now, and since I’ve been using ACV every morning, my subcutaneous fat – the hard-to-hit trace amounts that I no longer have infinite time to run off each week – has been melting away.  Some claim that ACV is an appetite suppressant.  I say: No shit.  For about 4-6 hours after taking a shot of vinegar, eating anything is pretty far from your mind.  For how much $5.00 buys, it’s worth trying.

Vitamin D.  I can’t point to a specific benefit here, since I began using it with Zinc, but before the ACV.  There is, however, an observed link between Vitamin D, sunlight and mood.  For people with Seasonal Affective Disorder, the lack of sunlight is particularly significant.  Vitamin D should help keep the sun-deprived – a population that likely contains many lawyers – on an even keel.

Nitrous Oxide.  I started using this powder as a pre-workout supplement to wake me up and bring purpose to my actions without getting wired on coffee.  On particularly hectic days, I take it before going to the office.  The effect when desk-bound is not as profound as when trying to keep 200+ lbs of iron from crashing on your head, but it definitely exists.  The advantage Nitrous offers over coffee is that the Nitrous energy is a bit more focused and sedate – simulating the effectiveness of a fabled “well-rested” person – as opposed to the stress-amplifying energy boost provided by coffee.

Whey Protein.  Boosts immunity and replaces calories that otherwise may have come from donuts. I have nothing against donuts; I think they’re a very decadent snack.  I also acknowledge that they’re terrible from a health perspective.  While a serving of whey protein packs about 150 calories per 20-25 grams or protein, the protein gives more energy, boosts immunity, and can actually help cut fat as long as its being used to replace at least some unhealthy eating.  (Drink enough of the stuff and the substitution for unhealthy foods will be inevitable.)  Generally, more protein = more energy = better productivity.  Think of it as eating a few pieces of chicken, but in liquid form and with a disgustingly obvious fake flavor like “strawberry.”  The real advantage, however, is immunity, as it is easier to swim faster than the crowd when they are besieged with effete “diseases” like the “cold” and “flu” while you continue to put in face time and bill, courtesy of your superior immunity.

17 Responses to More supplements for better living, lawyering

  1. wda says:

    Really? Does living in Las Vegas really require you to supplement a balanced diet with Dr. Oz cures?

    There are such easier ways to fuel your work-life rather than buying half of GNC.

    Try salami, cheese, and butter on pumpernickel bread for breakfast or/and lunch. It fills you up and lets you go about your day.

    Pumpernickel is a type of very heavy, slightly sweet rye bread traditionally made with coarsely ground rye. It is often made with a combination of rye flour and whole rye berries. The Germans in my family call it “black bread.”

    • I had to Google Doctor Oz. It makes sense that I’d never heard of him, since he was initially promoted by Oprah.

      Zinc may boost testosterone levels, which will prevent you from ever watching Oprah again.

  2. wda says:

    I will however try out your Apple Vinegar recommendation. It’s probably alot like eating saurkraut, which I enjoy doing all by itself.

  3. wda says:

    And also for the uniformed, pumpernickel bread comes in the form of a brick, not a loaf (as there is nothing soft about this bread), and usually comes sliced in quarter inch thick pieces. Most groceries, even in the Bay Area, don’t carry it but specialty stores will have it.

    Sorry, my German nature for detail is coming out. Regardless, I highly recommend pumpernickel bread. In fact I think I’ll just go make myself a sandwich right now. MMmmmm, … pumpernickel.

  4. dan says:

    since when is nitrous oxide a powder? sorry….thats sounding like pseudoscience. it’s a gas at room temp. I don’t know what you are taking but it ain’t nitrous. NO2 is laughing gas.

    not sure about the rest but my skeptic hat is on.

    also for the sort-of-informed, there are many ways to make pumpernickel, depending on the cultural origin (german, jew, polish, russian, etc). some make it thick as a brick, others make it as a loaf, like this while others bake it as a miche and still thicker than white bread, but not at all hard. I grew up on the soft stuff. it never came sliced.

    the local trend for foodies is a pumpernickel/rye swirl. all the #trend caterers are serving it at events.

  5. dan says:

    sorry typing too fast this AM. Nitrous is not NO2. N02 is a pollutant.

  6. Rmaxd says:

    erm Nitrous oxide, commonly known as laughing gas …

    No thanks … N2O that stuff is notoriously toxic if used constantly, as the original experimenters found out

  7. Rmaxd says:

    Oh yea whey protein is also bad for you, due to the fact its an isolate

    Also the process used to isolate the whey protein is also toxic

    If you want real protein raw eggs provide hundreds of times more concentrated protein due to its higher bioavailability, delivering the protein directly to protein sites without having to digest it

  8. Murphasaur says:

    Frances Marion (the Swamp Fox) drank vinegar regularly.

  9. Really... says:

    Nitric Oxide.

    Nitrous Oxide would have the opposite effect you’re looking for. Hard to keep 200+ lbs of iron from crashing on your head when you’re unconscious.

  10. Brooks says:

    Yeah that morning shot of laughing gas really gets me going too. I like to do the N20 right before I down my daily apple cider vinegar shot. That way, I’m too delirious to fully appreciate that I’m fucking drinking straight vinegar and oh god what’s wrong with me.

    I think you mean nitric oxide, not nitrous oxide.

  11. NO boosters like l-arginine also help with erections, as erections are, physiologically speaking, simply a matter of blood flow.

    I go through a can of NO-Synthesize a month.

    You can get good deals on Amazon with subscribe-and-save.

  12. picklefactory says:

    I heard that if you drink cider vinegar your comments get more upvotes from the alpha males at The Spearhead

  13. […] And vitamin D, and nitrous oxide, whey protein. Published: November 24, 2011 Leave a Comment Name: Required […]

  14. Bobby Jenkins says:

    I love it when lawyers try to talk science. The only lawyers I would trust in this matter are patent lawyers, and they really are not lawyers, now, are they?
    This list is pseudoscientific nonsense.

  15. Jordan says:

    What I take:

    – Vitamin D
    – Magnesium
    – ZMA before bed (will give you crazy dreams. You will also wake up crazy horny).
    – Zinc
    – B complex

    Have you read Robb Wolf and Mark Sisson’s books? If not, I’m going to mail you copies. But I’m guessing you’re already part of the whole paleo thing.

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