Never go full retard

But if you do, this is how you do it.

5 Responses to Never go full retard

  1. writerdood says:

    Awesome way to put it.

  2. ES says:

    Matt, I urge you to apologize immediately for disparaging the mentally handicapped. Not by saying “retard” but by associating them with Palin and Beck.

    But c’mon, seriously, progessives, how awesome are people like Palin and Beck for the progressive cause? They can toss in Orly Taitz for attorney general.

  3. Crudely Wrott says:

    I see a grand opportunity for the making of a bold and highly influential political statement. Suppose there does come to pass a Palin-Beck ticket . . .

    . . . and all over the country crowds of people are greeting the campaign at nearly every stop with a form of protest not familiar to most of us who have seen the campaigns of the last few cycles . . .

    . . . the Republican leaders seem to be at a loss for words. While there is a lot of sputtering and disjointed complaint there is no focused response to the new behavior of their opponents . . .

    . . . right wing pundits have been nearly silenced in the face of this unprecedented treatment from the left. While saying nothing specific about the Republican candidates and their platform, the message from liberals in unmistakable and seemingly unanswerable . . .

    So here’s what happens: all over the country we organize and commit to showing up where ever the candidates do. We show up quietly, assembling with supporters and media and the curious. We carry no signs, we don’t shout, we don’t argue, we don’t look cross-eyed at anyone. We behave impeccably. We bide our time.

    At some point the speaker(s) will start speaking a bit louder, starting a cadence that calls to mind pentecostal preachers. Their acolytes will begin to sway and shout in support and that’s when we spring the trap. By ones and twos and handfuls we start laughing. And pointing. Laughing harder and louder and pointing and slapping our thighs in high mirth. Laughing and pointing and gradually turning around and heading for the exit and peacefully making our different ways home, residual chuckles easing our steps, calling fond good byes to one another.

    I tell you, it would absolutely hang them up. It would so stupefy and mute them that all we would hear is a confused wail and grumble. They would self destruct.

    OK, I’m dreaming to think that it could actually be done (am I?). But I still think it is a good idea to employ organized public ridicule against those who so richly deserve it. And against their political heroes, too. Especially the heroes, for they have drunk extra deep of the kool aide and consider themselves important and indispensable. And that’s really funny!

  4. jfischer1975 says:

    I think Beck has as many qualifications to be a leader as our current do-nothing, stuffed-shirt, I-must-be-awesome-because-I-can-give-a-speech president.  Not that I want him (Beck) in the White House any more than the other one.

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