Buy This Book

Buy this book or I start killing kittens.

Buy this book or I start killing kittens.

I don’t plug products on this blawg very often. However, my little sister wrote a book called Go Tweet Yourself: 365 Reasons Why Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, and Other Social Networking Sites Suck.

Flip Twitter the bird.

Tell Facebook to f#@% off.

Lose it on LinkedIn.

Somewhere between the advent of Facebook and launching Twitter to the masses, the Internet betrayed us. It allowed pages to be viewed by job interviewers, newsfeeds to be flooded by Aunt Julie, and for constant tweets about what color socks that random girl from the study group is going to wear today.

This book is the hilarious reply all that says: enough is enough. We don’t want to see the pictures from your business trip to Omaha. We don’t want a page-by-page account of what’s going on in Twilight. We definitely don’t want a virtual drink!

When you can’t fix the problem, fix the blame. And since there’s no way in 2.0-hell that you can put an end to the bastardization of the Book, you may as well have a good laugh while pointing the finger at those who ruined their online experience.

Buy the book or this may be their last meal...

Buy the book or this may be their last meal...

I have a dozen kittens at my house. For each day that goes by that the book does not sell 1,000 copies, I shall place one kitten in a wood chipper. When I run out, I will comb the newspaper and find more kittens that people are giving away. The yard will run red with the blood of kittens, and it will be ON YOUR HANDS!

Go ahead. Call my bluff.

You better buy a copy of my little sister’s book.

Click here to buy it.

To the FTC: Yes, I got something for recommending this book. My little sister wrote it. She gave me her sisterly love for the recommendation. Now go shit in your hat.

10 Responses to Buy This Book

  1. Heather says:

    I don’t necessarily agree. I’m sure you’ve been exposed enough to my online “diary”. But…I will absolutely buy your sister’s book. Congrats Janelle.

  2. janelle says:

    Thanks big brother! And thanks Heather, both for buying and for saving a kitten.

  3. Heather says:

    But when/where to buy? Do tell.

  4. Nile says:

    As an inveterate Twitter/Facebook hater, I might have to actually _buy_ that, despite the fact that I also dislike kittens.

    And I’ve been thinking about odd stuff on the innertubes lately:

  5. theamygrace says:

    Looks like an interesting read. What’s your sister’s twitter handle? I’ll buy her book if she follows me. :-P

  6. Heather says:

    Ha, plus she’s hot…good luck.

  7. […] A reason that “Social Networking Sites Suck.“ […]

  8. Venkat says:

    Too funny. The FTC disclosure.

    I’m excited to check out the book. I fanned the Facebook page and followed the Twitter page (I think it’s called Un-Tweet or something like that.)

    I got a shout out that was funny :-) Not sure if the link will resolve, b/c Facebook is such a wonky piece of …

  9. […] With all do respect to Janelle, I think the lowest blow to her social media campaign traditional distribution strategy is having her brother plug her book on his blog the Legal Satyricon. […]

  10. […] I’ve never caught onto this whole twitter thing – I mean what critical thinking goes into “I’m hanging out at the mall” or “ I just masturbated”. Why do I care, and how long would that keep my attention? 3 seconds? Randazza is a notorious twitter hater (source). Apparently it runs in his family. […]

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