God Dis-ease

Satyriconista, Tatiana von Tauber

By Tatiana von Tauber

A Facebook post on my account stated: “Put this on your page if you know someone who has or had cancer♥ . Dear God, I pray for the cure of cancer. Amen. (93% won’t copy and paste this, will you?)”

I responded with this: “How about Dear Scientists, I will aid to fund and support your efforts to find a cure for cancer since God hasn’t delivered one yet. Ah, men.”

I have this little problem I can’t shake and it’s a religious God. Living in the south is becoming such an enlightening experience I often don’t know if I should laugh about this new reality surfacing before me or if tears might help me feel better. I don’t mind people believing in God, in that concept of being a part of something bigger than ourselves. We are. We just don’t know what the fuck it is. But to pray to God is something that holds so little weight on so many levels I’m boggled at how many support all this praying despite not a whole lot of positive results!

Though I’ve been diligently working to finish my book on eroticism, it’s morphed into something totally different than its original. The book is turning into a humanistic piece because in all of my research on love and truth and morality and sexuality, I can’t turn away from the fact that ultimately our only commonality which is almost always overlooked is simply our human nature, the fullness of what makes a human a human.  I’d much rather pray to myself, to my own personal consciousness inside to give me strength or solutions when I need them and know that it is within my power through creativity, thought, intention and action that I achieve anything at all. 

There is simply zero logic in praying for God to cure cancer when he hasn’t done it already!  Get?  It? Why do I feel like the lonely goat on a mountain?

Perhaps not all is lost.  The  American Humanist Association began an official godless campaign.  While I’m not a huge supporter of any particular godless or anti-god stuff, the praying and religion in this part of America is so in my face – moreso than I’ve ever experienced it anywhere else – that I’ve changed my mind this holiday season.   

This year’s holiday campaign aims to promote the idea of being good without God. For example, on D.C. ads that appear on the interior of Metro cars and buses the slogan is accompanied by the explanation, “Be Good for Goodness’ Sake. Humanism is the idea that you can be good without a belief in God.”

“Humanists have always understood that striving to make the world a better place is one of humanity’s most important responsibilities,” said Speckhardt. “Religion does not have a monopoly on morality–millions of people are good without believing in God.” (source)

This holiday season, I bid the LS audience a wonderful time with family and friends, safe travel, some good presents, many new accomplishments, lots of love and other fun knee activities besides praying.

Bitter About Wurtzel

By Tatiana von Tauber 

Satyriconista, Tatiana von Tauber

I knew there was something about Elizabeth Wurtzel that didn’t strike me right when I met her in Ft. Lauderdale while she worked on her book, Bitch. I couldn’t pin-point it then but I’ve got it now. While Wurtzel broke into the bestseller list with Prozac Nation, I was rather uninterested in the self-victimization I saw in her story and what seemed to be a boasting of being fucked up enough to warrant Prozac and then holding some level of pride in it. But, that’s a personal opinion and we know what those are like.  I’ll hand it to her for making it on her woes though. 

Surprisingly, I was rather impressed with Wurtzel’s interview on Bitter Lawyer and thought perhaps her unusual personality years ago might have been judged unfairly.  After all, I wasn’t in a good place in my life at that time to have warranted judgment on anyone so recently I’ve been opening up to what good Elizabeth Wurtzel might provide – for feminism. When I finished part 1 of the interview, my hopes crumbled. 

“Women could really make more inroads if they stuck it out [in law], but a lot of them opt out, and that’s really embarrassing to me.” […] 

Women can still get away with saying that motherhood is more important. Don’t get me wrong, motherhood is important, but I hate it when I see women using motherhood as an excuse to get their nails done. I can’t believe they still get away with that. 

Perhaps Wurtzel needs to be knocked up and barefoot, cleaning Diaper Genie crap balls which Randazza himself seems to know a bit about before she places her values onto motherhood.  What authority do feminists have on the topic if they’ve never popped a nugget out of their crotches before? 

Don’t get me wrong, law and policy are important but so is a mother’s influence.  I’d rather give up , compromise, postpone or modify my career should I choose to have a child and create a family and opt for a little self-pampering in the process - in-between shit diaper changes and full-time mom duty - because I’m more interested in making sure my kids don’t end up on Prozac rather than projecting my career or social change because true social change begins in the home, a point too many feminists miss.  

For a nation who feeds its citizens pills as solutions, perhaps women may need to sit at the dinner table with their family more often rather than a boardroom table and give family – partners and children - a modern feminist twist of a try.  Surely that’s a solution Wurtzel hasn’t considered. There’s nothing wrong with getting nails done, as it could be a time of relaxation, thought, reading catch-up or conversation which may or may not include important discussion and problem solving.  As men know, it’s not the shitter that’s important, but the success (for some defined as “size”) of the shit that comes out as a result. 

I know it isn’t easy getting excited about dinner time and motherhood responsibilities but the reality is somebody has to be a quality mother and there’s a whole new way to redefine motherhood and its value in this stage of feminism.  Wurtzel’s immaturity on the topic won’t help feminists like me. We’re in two completely different feminist realities and what she does as a lawyer, writer or feminist may never trickle down into helping feminist-motherhood needs.  Why?  Because she hasn’t cleaned enough shit balls to know the reasoning for opting out and doesn’t respect those who do.  What a bitch.

Grounded and Hounded: a male’s tale

By Tatiana von Tauber

Satyriconista, Tatiana von Tauber

Society places a lot of pressure on men. Feminist pieces like one by Katherine M. Franke at Columbia Law School add to it. Franke analyzes a recent New York Times article Still on the Job by Making Only Half as Much by Louis Uchittele. In a nutshell, Bryan Lawlor was a captain and current economic times made him a co-pilot. Lawlor’s pay was cut in half and now his wife makes more money.  He takes care of the kids more often and had to give up the power marker of masculinity, a motorcycle he finally bought as a gift for himself. As a result, Lawlor feels he’s downgraded not only in pilot status but masculinity as well.  A guy works hard, has a family and achieves success and then the economy goes bust. Franke kicks him while he’s down.

Franke’s piece is completely insensitive to the fact that men have feelings and blatantly devalues the mere thought of masculinity with such a sarcastic tone, the reader is left baffled at Franke’s nerve:

He can’t walk through the airport wearing the captain’s hat anymore – it “made me feel in command, and capable and powerful.” It’s hard not to laugh out loud at the unwitting (really?) reference to the well-known trope of the “hat” as penis-fetish and hatless-ness as a sign of castration. But just in case you missed the subtle implications of Lawlor’s downgrade to his masculinity, Uchitele connects the dots for you: Lawlor underwent a vasectomy shortly after his “downgrade” because he could no longer afford his former potency.

Franke missed the humanist piece with a reality slant: a successful American Dream love story gone bust. Where’s Franke’s heart? Lawlor had a sense of accomplishment as a captain vs. a co-pilot, a personal self-empowerment boost each time he wore his uniform. What’s wrong with that? I get a self-empowerment boost each time I wear fantastic high heels and a dress. And the audacity to compare this to impotence is merely penis envy.

Lawlor and his marriage are stressed and in the ways that he felt empowered as a man, breadwinner, husband, father, son and co-worker were snatched away unexpectedly.  However, these roles are what define him.  He is a man and his masculinity and how he projects, interprets or feels about it is a personal realm of definition Franke blatantly attacked with total disregard to the emotional struggles such a downgrade brings and Uchitele’s attempt to author that.

I somehow thought we were beyond this kind of reporting, reporting that is really loosely-veiled melancholia for the loss of a never-realized ideal of a particular form of masculinity.

With a piece that clearly doesn’t get the full picture of masculinity, Franke has little to stand on to throw out such slashing judgment about a man who simply wants to provide well for his family and feels crushed he doesn’t feel as empowered by the things which helped define his manhood and drove him further for himself and his family.  As Marc Randazza adds:

Males are acutely aware of the fact that they are, biologically speaking, irrelevant after the orgasm. Men, on the other hand, believe that they have to take care of their family long thereafter. This guy places the weight of his wife, his kids, and his parents on his shoulders. And, he proudly carries them there. That’s what a man does. Should men push themselves like that? Maybe not. This particular man’s interpretation of his masculinity is being in charge, and taking care of his family, and having a few toys that remind him that he not only made it past the finish line, but he did it with a few paces to spare.

And why not?  Don’t men deserve it?  Mine does.  Mine works in a job he hates and one that’s considered a health hazard for his spinal injuries obtained while serving in the US military so that I can make the choice to stay at home with our children and give them a home, one neither one of us had because our mothers worked.  He gives me freedom to educate myself and to be better.  I do all the laundry and he pays all this bills.  I go crazy at home with kids all day and he goes crazy at work with government morons all day.  Our pains, struggles, and daily frustrations are equal in intensity.  Only our perception is different but difference often times is a strength in healthy relationships.

 The future of feminism transcends the troubled and worn stepping stones we still stand on, where the fem is the ego projecting her image of as good or better than.  Questions a feminist should ask are: Do I seek gender equality or do I seek empowerment by regaining that what I and my fellow sisters have lost?  Do I wish to truly project into the future or do I wish to keep fixing the past that cannot be undone?  Do I know what gender equality means, feels, looks or performs like?  When so, look at it again.  Gender equality has many sides.

Women have proven themselves and yet there are feminists who still obtain pleasure exposing the weakness of men and insult the very qualities that make a man.  Masculinity is sexy and vulnerability humanizing.  Franke’s snide remarks are a slap to any value a man may have, specifically one who tries. Franke clearly has no vision for the future of feminism.

Jesus and His Blasphemous Nails

Jesus Does His Nails by artist Dana Ellyn

By Tatiana von Tauber

Today is Blasphemy Day and its objective is to “open up all religious beliefs to the same level of free inquiry, discussion and criticism to which all other areas of academic interest are subjective” according to Center for Inquiry, the host of the Blasphemy Day Artist Showcase exhibition. Meet Dana Ellyn. She’s the showcase artist and she’s getting lots of attention she doesn’t want for a painting which was spurred by creativity and a theme.

“I don’t want to be the poster child for atheism. It is a fact that I don’t believe in god or practice any religion – but that is not what defines me or my art.”

The attention Ellyn is getting is on her Jesus Does His Nails painting and the religious community is angry. CNN interviewed her last night. Pharyngula picked her up as did Politics Daily. Bill Donohue is mad and a slew of religious folks have been sending her hate mail. That’s nothing new in the controversial world of art and free speech. However, I got an inside scoop to some questions a pastor who’s a self announced “fundamental Christian” asked Ellyn. The question which poked me hardest served as an example of the crux of the problem with intolerance and that is simply blatant assumption:

“What would you say to someone like me, a Fundamentalist Christian, who has a hard time believing your statement that your “point is not to offend” after viewing paintings like “Jesus Does His Nails“, “Silly Rabbit, Myths Are For Kids” and “Bottled at the Source“? It would seem, in my opinion, the offensiveness is not only intended, but is quite possibly the objective of such pieces. Your response?”

Dana Ellyn was kinder than I would have been because if Ellyn really wanted to insult, she as many others, could find truly insulting and offensive imagery to blast at the religious community.  What Ellyn has is provocative art and that’s one of art’s purposes. Ellyn said she’s never consciously and intently sat down at an easel to paint something that would purposefully offend. What Dana Ellyn does – as many or most artists do – is she sits down at an easel with intent to provoke human emotion in order to ignite discussion, thought, critical thinking, or simple pondering. As Ellyn states,

“I hope they (art pieces) foster open-minded discussions. And perhaps induce a giggle or two along the way.” (Personally, I love her take on motherhood. Hook me up, please!)

To be fair, as I always try, of course the religious minded have the right to speak their mind too. That’s what freedom of speech is about – everyone having a voice. However, when speaking one’s mind turns into crazy forms of verbal harassment with blatant lack of tolerance as seen in the many comments on this article, one has to wonder what sunday school or God his behavior and ethics are modeled after when he attacks with things like Dana Ellyn must be stopped and punished. To Ellyn, that’s no longer simply a heated difference of opinion; it’s conscious – and proud – intent of wishing someone bad via punishment and full censorship for what is ultimately subjective expression. Ellyn views her art – as explained referencing to her piece Bottled At the Source (Dive Wine)- “as a literal depiction of what I had read – realizing that people may be offended but my inspiration for the piece was solely rooted in the desire to ‘illustrate’ the written words which explained the communion.”

Freedom of voice and expression are natural birthrights, yet those rights require self-responsibility. The responsibility some feel is in those who make controversial statements or art and that’s a thin line but really, the responsibility rests on those who interpret what is ultimately one subjective view in a sea of billions. Clearly, it’s a self-made problem.

Ellyn’s paintings hardly seem something to fear and yet, so many do -not the paintings of course but their message which shakes faith just a bit if not a lot. That’s not new in the ways of confronting firm ideology over generations but if Dana Ellyn’s few religious themes provoke people to ask her questions, then she’s initiated some discussion while expressing her freedom of expression. When those very people twist things on her and, as the pastor example shows, basically spell out for her what she thinks and intends – aka assumption- then it feeds the fear of ”losing my religion” .

Dana Ellyn’s paintings are fresh interpretations of myth and reality and the absurdity which surrounds us daily. She plays with her inner child and together they paint a “new world” to adults who take themselves, their ideas and their God too seriously and literally. Lighten up. It’s only a painting and Jesus is only what one makes him to be and nothing more. Diversity demands tolerance. Tolerance requires freedom of expression and freedom of expression is what Americans advocate.  Some do, anyway.

UPDATE: 

Here’s the CNN article, which slants a bit in Ellyn’s favor.  It’s a good article.

Why Fat Chicks Are Hot

By Tatiana von Tauber

Confidence is the biggest motivator of hotness there is. I’ve been trying to figure out why exactly confidence is so enduring, sensual, erotic and empowering not from the standpoint of having confidence but viewing others with it. It’s just sexy when in its right doses. I think confidence is like a musk, a pheromone likeness that ignites the brain’s attraction zone. The ugliest people can be very attractive if they’re confident in their own skin (a sense of humor and reasonable intelligence helps too). I think the same for fat chicks.

One obstacle I face in attracting women to have erotic and boudoir photos taken is most of them think they’re fat.  For those who are, convincing them that weight has little to do with sexual and erotic confidence is like convincing a tween that the pimple on the face isn’t as big as she thinks it is.  The horror is all relative. It’s hard to run from external imprints especially with beauty magazines doing everything to make the average (and healthy weighted) woman feel like a fat pig.  

Plus size model, Crystal Renn

Now a plus size model, Crystal Renn, used to be “too thin for a size 0″ before the modeling industry broke her down into an all out eating jamboree after years of eating less than 1,000 calories a day. She’s now a healthy size 12. For many women, size 12 is fat (for the modeling industry it nears obesity) but if a size 12 woman can look hot  and an even larger woman (“Largely Lovely“) edge, if not pass an erotic look, then the answer to the puzzling question of why fat chicks are hot seems only imprinted in the level of confidence they hold with respect to body image.

Renn and the “Largely Lovely” model I photographed exhibit a this is me and I love it attitude.  When a fat chick* can get into a bikini or naked and be proud, that’s confidence and even those who don’t find larger bodies sexy seem surprised that for a moment their mind gave large women more credit than previously. That’s appealing because it has good potential for women. It’s a stepping stone for breaking down the barriers society – mainly modern media – has created about what constitutes an attractive woman. If capitalism gained on the enterprise of good character opposed to good body, most women today would feel more sexually confident and everyone would strive for better character. Ah.  I’m such the failing idealist.

With the American porn industry saturated with Barbie dolls and European markets drenched in “barely 18″ girls, mass media creating young adults out of teens and actresses role modeling plastic surgery to fit in, there’s a slice of the pie that’s missed and it’s the sex appeal the average to large woman can have.  Clearly it’s possible but just as for thin women, looking hot takes some effort.  There’s a clear line between the fat woman who possesses confidence in her style and one who just looks like a blown up beach ball with lots of large Hibiscus prints, respectfully.  Looking good and feeling good ignite confidence and all three require conscious effort.

While it would progress both genders, large women really ought to open up to new meanings and visions of what is and can be sexy and become it.  That’s where confidence sits.  Perhaps that’s why find it so appealing.  It’s nothing short of sexy.  As far as I’m concerned,  it’s always nice to see a sexy and confident woman no matter what her size.  They’re few and far between right now.  That makes Renn and others like her healthy role models for the socially indoctrinated, which is basically everyone.

* fat chick is, of course, relative as well

Mexican Pole Dancing

by Tatiana von Tauber

A Facebook friend of mine posted this very sexy pole dancing video. I have yet to find any vulgarity in the dancer’s moves. Not only does this particular interpretation of pole dancing show off the beautiful female body in movement but oozes with sensuality and eroticism. I’d hand her some hard earned cash for the performance. It takes the “nasty” right out of the stripper’s arena.

What Americans Want to Know

by Tatiana von Tauber

One would think that the international editions of news magazines such as Newsweek and Time would be rather similar across the board.  Social Images blog will blow that concept out of the water.

Seems the international mind is interested in what’s really going on around the world – those issues which truly affect freedom, government and society.  America seems more interested in Annie Liebovitz, sex scandals of politicians and the Bible.  Once again, a firm reminder I’m not in Germany anymore. If I sing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”, will that change? Even the U.S. edition of CNN is very different than the international one I used to watch and since coming back to the states I find the news too Hollywood hyped for the kind of information I’m used to getting.

Here’ s the post with some rather startling news magazine covers to show just how UN-international the American mindset really is.

Voyeurism is Not a Gender Issue

Tatiana Von Tauber

By Tatiana von Tauber

Voyeurism can be a good thing – between couples in fantasy play no doubt but when taken into reality it is hideous. And while it’s surely women who fall victim, such as sportscaster Erin Andrews, it annoys me when it’s a crime marked with a feminist twist, as in this article.

Clearly men on average get off on female nudity more often than women get off on male nudity and I can’t think of one situation where a female was caught sneaking lesbian sex in a public bathroom or peeping through a hotel room at a naked guy – oh, but wait I do remember something.

When I was a kid my neighbor was a 6th grader and she taught me this cool trick of turning out the lights at night when her mom was working late and peeping at the apartment window across from her living room. In that apartment lived a young guy, probably in college and she’d get a kick out of the fact that he wore his tight jeans without underwear.

Yes, this example is of a kid’s curiosity but you know, the peephole thing lasted for years for her and habits form early. Voyeurism never did it for me. Not then, not now and that’s primarily because I felt awful for invading another’s privacy. Now, in fantasy play – well, that’s a different story.

Unfortunately it is primarily men who get caught in the act but for me the point isn’t that a man knowingly watched a woman. It’s that one human being invaded the privacy of another human being. Basically, the crime is in the privacy matter, not the gender. And while I also know there is a lot of sexism in America, much less the world, I have to wonder if men sometimes roll their eyes and think, “Oh brother, here we go again”.

I’ve known a few men in my time who were abused and harassed by a woman and it’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Besides being a pussy in front of other guys, there’s a sense of personal shame from the standpoint of having little possibility of being taken seriously for such honesty simply because it is thought of as such weakness. Just as women have pressure of fighting off the stereotype for their feminine “inferiority”, men have pressure ridding their masculine “superiority”. Not all women are weak and not all men are strong. There are women who take advantage of the sexist card and those women make it harder for everyone – specifically those men who never inflicted any harassment or abuse but were accused anyway.

It’s very unfortunate and upsetting that Andrews’ privacy was invaded but the gender issue shouldn’t be the focus. It further stamps attention on a crime from a default inferior position (the female is the victim again); meaning, if we focus on the negative, that’s all we see and it spews greater anger. Focusing on the crux of the matter – the loss privacy, thus personal freedom – is a more balanced and equal position.

Mowing the Feminine “Lawn”

By Tatiana von Tauber

Well, if this commercial isn’t a testament to the fact that some people can have a whole lot of fun with sex, genital trimming, and gender stereotyping then nothing is.

As any women, I sat with my jaw somewhat dropped thinking “WTF?!” but as the commercial progressed and keeping in mind the huge discussion here on LS and a great contribution by sex therapist Dr. Marty Klein about shaving down there, be it mound or balls, I couldn’t help to laugh out loud. This commercial is great, especially the line “So all that’s left for me to see are tulips on the mound.”   Perhaps I’ve just acquired the male sense of humor.  I don’t know.  I about fell off my chair in laughter.

 
It punches those who can’t handle a little fun with sexuality or the various shapes of mound trimming but to others it’s certainly a fun, creative and silly example of how much more fun we could have about sexuality if we get over those hangups about it.

So glad I belong in that group. And yeah, it’s a lot of fucking fun. Figuratively speaking, of course.

Short Url: http://bit.ly/rhZ3M

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Technorati :  feminism

The French Bitch Gets All the Men

Tatiana Von Tauber

By Tatiana von Tauber

“I am a master flirt,” says Lisa Solod Warren, feminist and inspiration to women with her piece about the difference between the love lives of American and French women, Why American Women Are Alone When They Don’t Want to Be.  American women seem to neglect the art of flirting in the scheme of dating and relationship building yet it’s the strongest communication tool we have — to say nothing for the fact that it is a whole lot of fun. While there’s an art to flirtation, simply its mere possibility inflates the self-confidence with the opposite sex. French women play with love as though an adventure rather than a job, as many American women seem to do, says Warren.  

French women also opt to leave the sweats and flip-flops at home and dress each day as if consciously enjoying and playing with the strengths of their femininity – be it by clothing, sexuality or flirtation – French women express pride and comfort with their gender.  As mothers, the French are  less stressed out than Americansaccording to Judith Warner, author of Anxiety and the Age of Motherhood Madness.  Are American women doing something wrong?  Have they missed an important element in personal happiness?

“As American women we are ambitious and career oriented, and many of us will approach our search for love as if we were a recent MBA grad looking for a great job.”
And therein lies the problem…The key to a French woman’s success with men is in knowing her own sexuality, her own sensuality and her own power.” (source)

I’m thrilled to see the feminist wisdom I so often preach embraced by other women. This is very encouraging.

The Virgin in the Garden

 By Tatiana von Tauber

[Michelle Obama has] become the spokeswoman for all sorts of issues and topics – from fitness, parenting, the environment and women’s rights, to redefining images of black women in American culture and promoting self-esteem for young girls.
Yet in the midst of all those themes, it isn’t yet clear whether her self-described core messages – about military families, volunteerism, and helping working women balance work and family life – are truly breaking through. Some wonder if she’s spreading herself too thin to emerge in the public mind as a leading voice on those topics. (source)

Mindy Sabella, director of marketing at Siegel+Gale specializing in stragegic branding called the First Lady “fragmented”.  She couldn’t figure out why Michelle was planting herbs!  Factor in all of Michelle Obama’s representations as a successful African-American mother and feminist, I’d trust her intiution with planting gardens. First Lady Obama is simply weeding out what won’t work, what doesn’t interest her quite enough to focus on it with the limited time she has.  That’s a tough job in and of itself.  She’s a virgin in this new role but wise enough to be broad minded as I think the next generation of feminists are. The bigger picture tends to lead us into wiser choices.

I can’t thank the feminist movement enough. Though I disagree with second wavers’ views on many levels, feminism as a whole worked by creating possibility where none existed before.   The weight on Michelle’s shoulders, as her husband’s, is enormous and what I find responsible is the fact that neither President or First Lady Obama are jumping into anything without testing things out, thinking about them, and informing before trying new approaches.  A new approach is in fact what they were voted in hopes for.  Not everything will work or make sense and only pioneers set forth new ideas in the muddy waters of government and social understanding.  Never in  my lifetime have I been so excited about the future of politics and America and that excitment isn’t quite for its success but to witness its evolution. I believe we’re tipping the disaster or the uprising of a new America.  What an interesting time for me to be here.

Human beings have always survived and corruption in America is nothing new.  What is new for my generation, however, is that at this moment, we are sitting on the edge of a huge change in American consciousness.  I’m very curious to see how women will take over the world while men become their equals and how the meaning of what it means to be American begins to redefine  itself.

If Michelle Obama seems unconventional, get used to it. Unconventional is what young and new feminists dare to be.   What my girls need are role models not only in feminist actualization but in the role of good will, service, bravery, open-mindedness, compassion for others and self-respect and love for being who one is.  That, as our First Lady, is a rarity in the garden of hope:

“She is not trying to be a symbol of the first lady. She is trying to connect with the vast number of Americans who would like to have a person similar to them and their ideal. It’s more of an indirect approach,” said Howard Rubenstein of Rubenstein Communications, Inc. “She is more like an ambassador of friendliness and good will, and it is working very well. I would want to hire her as a PR person because she hasn’t lost touch. She doesn’t believe that as first lady, she has to be meeting with kings and queens.”  (source)

 

Loss of America’s Beautiful Mind

Tatiana Von Tauber

By Tatiana von Tauber

My philosophy instructor’s teaching method was very unconventional for an otherwise conservative Brit. He didn’t make students write papers but instead creatively elicited outside the box thinking. Assignments were fun, as we were given total freedom in how to express our thoughts and ideas. The focus wasn’t on proper academics but on the enjoyment of internalizing the philosophical concepts themselves, which could be mind-stretching. He allowed imaginations to fertilize the garden of so ideas. I had a great time and aced my assignments because that kind of learning optimizes my interest, desire and retention.

The Absurdity

When I compare European and the American schools of thought, I slam into the baseline of why I fear for America’s future: there is a loss of common sense about living, loving, and learning  here. Never mind that my son has to sing God Bless America after reciting the Pledge of Allegiance every morning in 3rd grade or that girls have to get creative with their moms to figure out how to sneak maxi pads to school without them being seen through their required clear plastic backpacks. There’s lots of absurdity sense there: song for religious patriotism and clear backpacks for safety.

What about the sense of the rules forbidding the exposure of shoulders, backs, chest, and other personal areas? When did shoulders become a hot erogenous zone? Since when are they such a threat that they must be placed in the same category as personal areas to cover up in an effort to eliminate student distraction?  Did I miss the “Armpits Become Sexy” brief?

In the Georgia school system, where my children attend, there is a prohibition on “displays of affection”. What kind of display of affection are children disallowed, I wonder. A hug? Holding hands? A peck on the cheek by youth learning the power and joy of puppy love? Heaven forbid teens steal a kiss before class; the exchange of saliva might pose a health threat.

I’m seeing a total breakdown in the beauty of the American mind – one that was once free and enjoyed life – and the pollution from the runoff as the American mind decomposes is filtering into the schools and coming to rest in my little ones’ psyches.

More Absurdity and the Creation of Fear by Moguls

The American consciousness is no longer one of the pioneers, nor of “give me liberty, or give me death.” The American unquenchable thirst for freedom has turned into a parched landscape of fear. Enough of a majority buy into it and sell that which we once held as the core of our existence. Like a spoiled child, the government tests how much freedom it can take away — selling its confiscation as being for our own safety, but isn’t this jingoism overplayed? Perhaps it is time for a new PR company to capitalize on ignorance and stupidity as they hush the intelligent and creative. Americans put up with it. They want to be safe, pampered, taken care of, reassured that they will continue to have access to American Idol. For that, they would sell everything that it means to be American.

We ask our leaders to, well, “lead,” yet those very same people demand strict enforcement of absurd rules such as all children must have their shirt tucked in at all times and must wear a belt if pants have belt loops in school and during any school-related activities off campus. The penalty for breaking the dress code can result in a possible one day in-school suspension between the second and fifth offense; off-school suspension for offenses thereafter. My public school system demands Sunday school obedience and behavior while precious tax dollars fund teacher police.

My daughter faces odd anxiety, sometimes panic attacks every night when planning her outfit. She’s already dealing with culture shock and an international move. Last night we ruled out 5 of her 13 outfits she hasn’t grown out of yet as possibly inappropriate for school here but acceptable in Germany. This morning I had to measure that her skirt was no more than 4 inches above the knee even though she had on leggings, which must be worn with a regular length dress according to the dress code. She said she worried all day about getting a warning because her skirt rode up an inch or two on the leggings she must wear to hide the horrible eczema and open sores she justifiably wants no one to see on her bare skin.

I’m wondering if I missed the part in the handbook where she has to hide her face. Kids are already forbidden to bring sunglasses to school, their clothing must be hemmed, pants cannot touch the floor, tank tops are off limits and 4th and 5th graders have been forced to stand facing a wall with their hands up on it as though about to be frisked for up to 60 minutes when they disobeyed the no talking rule in the bus room.

Sex, Drugs and Rock-n-Roll No More

I’m sorry. Have I landed on another planet or is this really America, the land of the free, home of the brave? Where have all the cowboys gone? I’m surrounded by bad guys and their philosophies reflect illusions of freedom in their shiny guns. How is it even possible that common sense freedoms have slipped through American fingers? I’m in dismay after only a short time back in the United States.

America’s war on terror is the least of our problems. We’re facing a war on youth that lacks all reason, but comes with a heaping helping of absurdity. I’m stunned that Georgia considers these punishments to have any semblance of proportionality. Talking is a severe offense here it seems and teachers – to abide by school rules and to keep their jobs – are treating children like potential criminals. There is no presumption of goodness in our children. Children are being indoctrinated to shut up, put up, do what you’re told, all in the name of order.

What’s necessary is teaching children creatively and nurturing their developing social skills, encouraging their potential and respecting their voice, thoughts and new blood ideas. In the age of the Internet facts are at our fingertips. Creativity will shrivel on the vine are unless we trust our children to find their place in the world that we adults have messed up for them. One day they’ll realize just how screwed up their parents really were.  Revenge is the nursing home. Beware!

Albert Einstein said “it is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge” and “the true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination”. My philosophy teacher taught creatively and made learning fun. Granted we were adults but kids are better, smarter and more capable than most adults give credit for. The ability to have fun in school sparks a desire for learning and that always creates a positive impact.

Censorship of Fun

It boggles the mind that fun has become so threatening to America. What happened? Did the Baby Boomers and Gen-Xers forget the beauty of youth? Do they consider the irony of their current war on joy as they sit in the misery of their own creation and then dictate limitations on freedom because they want to “protect” their children and grandchildren from the very experiences they had in their youth? Are they tempted by youthful freedom and vivaciousness as the religious are tempted by sex? Must they, like the religious, outlaw any temptations that might be too difficult to resist? The young don’t need Viagra and let’s face it my generation is getting old and I hate to say it, bitter to youth.

Exactly why does adult authority feel the need to “protect” the young quite so much? Didn’t they (we) have the freedom to enjoy their (our) youth? Were times really safer then or is it simply that we weren’t constantly bombarded by the fear-mongerers?  I really don’t know but I take an educated guess the latter is a stronger force than the former. Lets face it, programs get funded when you can whip parents into a frenzy.

Like life always finds a way to grow in a niche, youth will always find a way to rebel. When we tighten the grip, we merely force them to find a new way to slip through our fingers. If we should fear anything, it should be the creativity of youth when forced to find new, secretive outlets for the natural capacity for a teenager to test boundaries. Unfortunately, in encouraging them to do so, we also teach them that they courage, bravery, and having a voice are all negatives — and as American youth loses those traits, we lose more than the mess we may need to clean up on a Monday morning. Schools – specifically my kids’ school in Georgia – is nurturing obedience as though children were dogs to train, God’s children to scare into moral and appropriate behavior or robots to program. I keep looking for the Stepford wives.  I hear their hair is perfectly hair-sprayed.  I let mine flow wild in the wind.  That’s how you’ll know I’m real if you see me on the street.

Nobody sane should be against reasonable boundaries, but boxing in our youth’s minds and clipping their wings too early is not a reasonable boundary. Social control has become complete control. Reason forces questions and self-responsibility and one cannot control others when others question authority’s justifications for mandated rules. Our young generation and freedom  itself  is in danger if fear as we morph into a society that values obedience over creativity and reason.

Daughter Like Mother? Perhaps Not for Bristol.

By Tatiana von Tauber

Dr. Marty Klein’s recent post Bristol Palin’s Wisdom: Better Than Science? is more excellence from the Legal Satyricon’s “primary care doctor.” Klein explains the frustration of science being overlooked but teen expertise being “superior”, particularly among the media with respect to premarital sex and pregnancies.  I’d like to add a few thoughts:

Though I empathize with Dr. Klein’s view and agree, it’s important to keep in mind where a good majority of minds are coming from on the issue of premarital sex, abstinence and birth control.   Unfortunately, kids don’t relate to science though it would be nice if more did.  Youth relates to each other and Bristol Palin would be a fantastic candidate for advocating comprehensive sexual education among the conservative circle.  Us adults might not like her as the “expert” but really, she is in her own way. 

She got screwed by her boyfriend, her mother, conservative society and the media and now pays the price.  Her expertise comes from not scientific facts, research, surveys and polls; it comes from real life mistakes and nothing teaches us better than when we learn from them.  Should Bristol Palin do so, it’s her responsibility in her “16 minutes of fame”, as Dr. Klein puts it, to do her part in ensuring other young girls don’t get trapped by views her mother so strongly holds, views she apparently doesn’t share. 

If Bristol Palin accomplishes this, she’s a good kid turned great woman.  She was simply wrongfully guided by conservative society about sexuality and birth control.  It is unrealistic to manipulate teen hormones and not expect rebellion. In a way, after seeing how the new county I live in fears children into “proper behavior”and that I live in a very faith-based town in the U.S. south (lucky me), I’m gaining an idea about just how fear is used to control and direct kids into “morality” and when you’ve got a mother who’s a moose killer, you listen.  I’d love to blame Bristol for her youthful stupidity but really, I blame the adult stupidity that created Bristol Palin’s fate.  She had choices and wasn’t given the right to make them. 

Let’s see if Bristol Palin uses her whiplash famed power with more intelligence than her mother.  It would be good for women, feminists and American families.  It’s her choice now.

Bikinis and All Those Nuts and Bolts

Tatiana Von Tauber

By Tatiana von Tauber

Ever wonder what a plumber is thinking about when beneath a woman’s sink?  Put her in a bikini and I bet he’ll be thinking of how to loosen the pipes with a whole lot of pep in his step…

New research shows that, in men, the brain areas associated with handling tools and the intention to perform actions light up when viewing images of women in bikinis. (source)

Now that we can peer into the brain and map the privacy of thoughts, take a guess at how many males are going to go to the doghouse for that brilliant info!

Just what kind of tools and intentions are we talking about here however?  Well men do have an intimate relationship with their penis.  Besides it having a name, it’s fondled, stroked, played with, twirled and tucked.  I won’t go further.  Of course this new research is no surprise but how spooky is it that now science can back up the fact that men think with their dicks? 

I’m sorry.  Were the tools more like hammer and screwdriver where subconsciously a male thinks of ways to build a fertile bikini clad woman a house made out of coconuts because he intends to procreate and stick around to care for the kids? Leave it to evolution to muster up the grand illusion necessary for species survival:  sexual pleasure in exchange for procreation.   And thus, we have the battle of the sexes.

I like Mother Nature’s insistence and demand that sexuality is a must-be-so-get-the-fuck-over-it aspect of life. That be the case, and it’s looking mighty strong that sex is here to stay: Celebrate. Bikinis invite celebration of the female body, assuming the body in it causes the handyman’s brain areas to shine. To me it’s a sign of a healthy man and woman, both still interested enough to look, to have fun with what usually is only momentary fantasy.  What causes the deep-seated insecurity that gives rise to the sick and twisted thought process shared by the Taliban, sex-negative Christians, and sex-negative second-wave feminists — this theory that such momentary fantasy is somehow “harmful?”

Women go out of their way to be more beautiful, thinner, more sexually pleasing yes, to their preferred mating targets, but also to themselves. Boob jobs, liposuction,  Botox, make-up, Brazilian wax, lingerie, high heels, garters, and so on.  Women seek attention from men and men respond.  How far women allow men to go in response is the debatable factor between how men and women treat each other. 

Wearing bikinis is a conscious or unconscious call for attention to our bodies and sexuality.  It’s as skimpy as women are allowed to go while being publically acknowledged as moral, decent and accepted — or at least while being left alone by the police. French fashion historian Olivier Saillard argued  “the power of women, and not the power of fashion” and “the emancipation of swimwear has always been linked to the emancipation of women”. Bikinis are the look at me peacock tails,  ”a mating call”, if you will and they’ll always be in fashion.

The next time you see a second-waver sneering at the thought of a man ogling a scantily clad woman, consider that the man has a biological and evolutionary reason for doing so. In fact, mere ogling is worthy of respect when one considers the physiological and evolutionary forces taking hold of the poor guy’s instincts. And the visual display from the female ignites the instincts in the male, and like so many birds we engage in our complex mating dance of lust, attraction, and love.

Since most countries do not allow women to be on a public beach naked, thus displaying all they may have to biologically offer, the bikini it is.  Swimming with clothes on is less preferable.  But what of my own evolutionary instincts? When I go to the beach,  no way in hell do I check out hot guys without a shirt on.  I wouldn’t want to place myself in a similar category as men place themselves.  Imagine a woman sexually objectifying a man? Horrid, I say.  Absolutely horrid. 

Michelle Obama: Mom-in-Chief

By Tatiana von Tauber

It’s as though the first couple hypnotized millions.  I too have become star struck.  Is the hypnotized state what makes the Obamas so captivating to imaginations run by hope?  Barack Obama’s promise of change is forcing all sides to unite whether they want to or not, i.e. Rick Warren.  Barack’s presence tempts our curiosity to witness what he’ll do, who’ll he be and what that may mean to America’s future.  But, what about Michelle?  She’s captivating in her own right.

I like how Michelle Obama took a “back seat” by setting her children’s future up front. Her husband’s fame is her fame.  Her husband’s legacy will not be hers.  Michelle Obama is a strong African American feminist who chose family and her actions will paint her legacy.  Her sense of maternal value shined through her golden dress on Inauguration Day and I wonder, cannot a First Lady be just as lovely and valued as a First Mother?  Can American women find hope and a different sense of balance between career and motherhood without sacrificing the needs of their children?  Can American women accept being a husband’s equal accessory while still being great mothers and independent individuals? 

Michelle Obama’s children are aged around mine so I know what some of her concerns might be from a parental perspective.  I like that Barack Obama is a father of girls.  I have daughters too.  I believe their combined sights will benefit the American family. I’ve noticed the way the Obamas structure the importance of their family around events and I think Michelle could provide a fantastic opportunity to help reshape the way America views family, motherhood and feminism.  Most of all, I love that Michelle’s priorities are in the right places: “My first job in all honesty is going to continue to be mom-in-chief, she said.  Feminism of the past left family behind.

I’m particularly thrilled to see Michelle’s mother move into the White House to help, that all the generations of the Obamas can share in the experience of presidency while they raise children and experience what it is to be a family to the best of their circumstantial ability.  This is a custom more families should reintroduce as the older generation adds richness to family, and “affordable”, trusting child care.  Michelle appears to understand and value the powerful influence of motherhood and it’d be nice to see that philosophy spread to the American masses. 

I think First Lady Michelle Obama is really the best example of feminism gone right and she’s in a fantastic power position where she can popularize her sense of elegance and her value of motherhood.  Women need this and families need a proud and willing mother-in-chief.