For those of you who are new to the profession, or those of you who are simply wondering why your job as an attorney is so stressful, David Maister offers some advice.
The toughest lawyer is not the one who is the most obnoxious. Clients will say they want a tough son of a gun to make somebody life’s miserable, a real bulldog, etc.
Don’t be that person. It’s been my 100% uniform experience that the bulldog only adds time, expense, stress and confusion to an otherwise inevitable result. Even clients can’t stand them after a couple of months. You want to be tough? Have the best preparation on the facts, the law and the strategy. Judges care only about those things, not a whit for bluster. Bullies are jerks, they wreck the profession for everyone, and you can beat them every time.
And finally and hands down most importantly, and please pass this on to your friends and your children, because it’s really important — Be nice and have fun. Just doing that makes life better for everybody, mostly you.
Fortunately, most of the lawyers I have met as opposing counsel already know this. I learned it very early in my career from a great guy in Fort Myers, and as a result, most of my best friends in the profession are former opposing attorneys. Unfortunately, I have encountered my fair share of douchebags in this profession as well. That’s fine, I think that despite Maister’s wisdom, one does need a punching bag to get out one’s aggression — douchebag lawyers serve that purpose for me.
In an ongoing SLAPP suit in Arizona, it seems that someone has been ignoring Maister’s advice and engaging in a little bit of litigation douchebaggery. See Best Western v. Doe, Case 2:06-cv-01537-DGC (D. Ariz.)
The Court assumed that the case would settle or be tried in a relatively simple proceeding. The Court again was wrong. On October 15, 2008, the parties filed 2,939 pages of material. These include a 125-page joint proposed final pretrial order, 31 motions in limine, and three longer motions that should have been motions in limine. In a remarkable feat of microscopic dissection, the parties sliced four modest claims into 51 separate factual disputes and 30 issues of law. Plaintiffs listed 52 potential witnesses and Defendants listed 69. Plaintiff listed 434 exhibits (with 175 pages of objections to defendants’ exhibits), and Defendants listed 320 exhibits (with 63 pages of objections to Plaintiff’s exhibits). The parties claim the need for 102 hours of trial time, which would require a five-week trial.
These filings are wasteful in the extreme.The Court is not a forum for the parties to expend every possible dollar seeking to litigate every conceivable issue, no matter how insubstantial. The Court will no longer tolerate the excesses of this case. (Op. at 3-4, emphasis added)
HT: Eric Goldman
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